Kelly is in a bind. She drugged her pimp and beat him up.

She didn’t roll him, but she took back the money he stole from her. To add humiliation to bumps and bruises, she yanked down her headshot from the gallery over his mantel and tore it to pieces.

Now she has to get out of town. So she lands in nowheresville.

Nowheresville is quaint. Very mom and pop. There are lots of houses with immaculate lawns and white picket fences. There are pleasantly plump old ladies with platefuls of cookies too–and little kids with balloons, skipping.

Lots of skipping.

When Kelly gets off the bus, she looks perfectly respectable. Her dress is stylish and well made, more for business than pleasure. Or maybe it’s the other way around. Her hair is mid-length, combed away from the face with very little bounce. She carries decent luggage.

Never in my wildest dreams would I suspect that Kelly’s a prostie. But I’m not a cop either. Griff is. He’s the head honcho cop of Grantsville, the real name of nowheresville.

And since Griff’s a cop, he naturally hangs out at the bus stop. As such, he has access to state-of-the-art-high-class-call-girl radar. All cops have it in noirwheresville.

I know. You’re welcome.

Kelly has her own top-of-the-line cop radar, so when they exchange hellos they practically short out the electrical grid with all the sparks flying. Still, they come to terms–20.00 introductory rate (remember, it’s 1964)–and go to his place.

Afterwards he sprawls on the couch while she sits on the floor. They chit chat about the prostitute business.

Griff brushes Kelly’s hair. She tells him it’s just now getting to the length she prefers since her pimp shaved it off as punishment for an indiscretion. Griff is horrified. He offers to introduce her to Candy, the madam across the river in a “wide open” town.

He informs her that he drops by Candy’s on occasion to visit her “bonbon girls.” If she’s going to set up shop there, he’ll drop by more often. But he warns her not to do business in Grantville. It’s not that kind of town.

Then he leaves Kelly alone in his apartment while he gets back to cop business. She needs to freshen up and he trusts her. He knows she’s not that kind of a call-girl from chit chatting with her.

While Kelly is putting on her makeup she takes a good long look at herself in Griff’s mirror (because…well, that’s what us girls do when we put on makeup and she’s at his house.) In spite of her perfect cheekbones and respectable hair, she doesn’t like who she sees.

She decides she doesn’t want to become a “bonbon” girl at Candy’s in the “wide open” town across the river. So she rents a room in a pleasantly plump little old lady’s boarding house instead and gets a straight job as a physical therapy assistant in a children’s orthopedic hospital.

Kelly’s really good at being a physical therapy assistant. (So good, I was impressed. I thought about going into the field myself after my knee surgery, but there was too much math and science involved.) She’s nice but tough. She doesn’t let kids slide because they’re disabled.

Everybody at the hospital likes her. Even the tough as nails, masculine head nurse. ( I wasn’t as impressed with that, but that’s just me.) There she catches the eye of the well-healed J.L. Grant, Griff’s best friend and the philanthropic namesake of the town and hospital.

Griff is none too pleased. It’s not so much that he’s jealous, it’s just that he’s decided that, in spite of the chit chatting, Kelly is that kind of a call-girl. He threatens to tell J.L. about her very recent past despite all the good that she’s done: teaching crippled kids to walk, giving a knocked up nurse some money so she can start a new life without having to resort to an abortion, beating Candy to a pulp for trying to recruit “bonbon” girls from the nursing pool.

But Kelly beats Griff to the punch. She tells J.L. about her past and…he barely bats and eye! They embrace–and he gives her a naked kiss.

No, not that kind of naked kiss…the naked kind of a kiss..

Let me explain.

A naked kiss is a perverted kiss. It’s a subconscious thing. If you’re a guy and woman gives you a naked kiss, you probably won’t give it a second thought because you’re a guy.

But, if you’re a woman and a man gives you a naked kiss, there’s a good chance you’ll get that “hair on the back of my neck stood up” feeling. It’s our intuition and it’s a God given protection mechanism.

Sometimes the woman’s intuition is sabotaged by her naivete and kindness. She feels something is wrong, but she puts it out of her mind. Especially if the guy is an upstanding, well educated member of society. Or if she convinces herself that he’s really good and that she’ll help him change.

But, of course, Kelly’s anything but naive. And it’s not her first naked kiss, either.

She’d do well to mind her intuition…as we all would, ladies.

As we all would.

  • Kelly – Constance Towers
  • Griff – Michael Dante
  • Candy – Virgina Grey
  • Head Nurse – Patsy Kelly
  • Miss Josephine (pleasantly plump little old lady) – Betty Bronson
  • Cinematography – Stanley Cortez
  • Written by – Samuel Fuller
Samuel Fuller and Constance Towers